


Nosocomephobia

by HappyLeech



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Bad Things Happen Bingo, Confusion, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 15:11:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18640621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappyLeech/pseuds/HappyLeech
Summary: Caboose is unconscious, Tucker’s arm is broken, and Washington’s got a knife.BTHB Prompt: (post) 'I know you're in there' fight





	Nosocomephobia

Of all the things for Dr. Grey to call on Donut for, he wasn’t expecting to be asked to help the doctor with Wash. He’d been hoping for bootleg wine and whine night, but when he poked his head into her office she was pacing about, no liquor in sight.

“Oh, thank god, you’re not in your armour,” she stalked forwards and grabbed his shoulders, spinning him around so he was facing her door. “I need your help. Carolina is gone and apparently you’re the  _ only _ person on your team who answers my calls.”

“Well, Sarge is out on a mission and—what happened?! Your face…” Donut craned his neck so he could see her face. Her eye was turning black and her lip was split, but she just waved away his concern with a grin.

“Oh, I got off easy! You should see what happened to Tucker and Caboose.”

Donut blinked owlishly at her. “Caboose and Tucker punched you?” That didn’t sound right.

“No, no. Washington did. He broke Tucker’s arm, knocked out Caboose, and punched me. We’ved locked him in the OR for the time being,  _ buuuuut _ he’s armed and I don’t want him to hurt himself.” Not letting go of his shoulders, Grey started walking and Donut was forced too as well so he didn't end up face-planting on the ground. 

“Why would he do that?” Donut asked, spinning as they walked to link arms with the doctor. “I mean, I’m all for a little rough and tumble now and then too, but…”

Grey laughed. “Oh, we just found out that a head wound  _ plus _ the sedatives he was given on the transport back didn’t mesh very well. He’s a little confused, convinced that he’d already been discharged from the military and is living at home,” she waved to the nurses and soldiers standing outside of the doors. “I’m just hoping that you can slip inside and get that knife away from him. Maybe pop the IV in his arm out too- We were in the middle of getting something to flush his system when... anyways, if he lets you just pop on a pair of gloves and pull it out.” Grey said, patting him on the back before nudging him forwards.   


Everyone moved aside as Donut and Grey approached, and she looked at one of the nurses. “Any change?” he shook his head. “Oh well. Good luck, Donut.”

Donut looked back once, before knocking on the OR door.

“Wash?”

Something banged into the wall, and Donut jumped. “That’s not my name! It’s David,” Wash, no,  _ David _ shouted from inside.

“Hey, sorry David. It’s Franklin, can I come in?” Donut asked, deciding that Frank probably would go over better with Wash than Donut.

“…yeah.”

With one last look behind him, Donut unlocked the OR and slipped inside. He would be lying if he said hearing the door lock behind him wasn’t nerve-wracking.

 

Washington looked...well, he looked terrible. When they were with the Feds, Wash had looked tired and stressed, but how he looked now was taking it to another level. There was an IV hanging on his arm, bags under his eyes, and a trickle of blood running down his forehead into his eyes.

But at the same time he smiled when he saw Donut, dropping the knife he was holding onto a tool tray. “Shit, Frank. It’s been ages,” he said, sounding nothing like the Freelancer Agent that he was. “How have you been?”

“Not bad, David. And it’s Franklin, you know,” Donut said, slowly walking closer.

Wash made a face. “Well, if you’re going to call me David instead of Dave, then I’m going to call you Frank instead of Franklin. How’s the wife?”

Donut couldn’t help himself and snorted. “Non-existent," he said with a grin. "My sister’s wife is good though, last I heard. Why’d you punch the doctor?”

Wash shifted, looking guilty, before he patted next to him on the bed. “Look, I don’t like hospitals, right?”

Donut nodded. “It’s kind of obvious,” he said, sitting.

“Right. Well, I get clocked and when I open my eyes there’s all these people standing around me, telling me that my name is “Washington” and that I’m an “Agent”, even though I got discharged for the punching thing and went back to the farm,” Wash said, doing finger quotes as he spoke. “So suddenly people are arguing with me and trying to grab me and stick me with more needles, so I started swinging.”

He paused, having the grace to look shamefaced. “I do regret punching the doctor, but the other folks deserved it.”

Donut shook his head. “You broke Tuck-Lavernius’ arm.”

Wash frowned. “Lavernius? Why do I know that name?”

“He’s your boyfriend, Dave. And Dr. Grey said you knocked Michael out too.”

Donut watched as Wash cycled through at least four or five emotions before he settled on ‘ _ horrified and embarrassed _ ’. “Shit. I knew Mike had a glass jaw, but I didn’t know it was that bad…” He reached up to rub his forehead, looked at the blood on his fingers, and sighed, wiping his hand on his pants. “Be real with me, Frank. That—Lavernius really is my boyfriend? Because I’ve had shit like that pulled in high school and I think we’re both past that.”

“Would I really do that?” Donut said, crossing his arms. “What kind of person do you take me for?”

“The kind of person who runs off with the shoelaces from every pair of boots our CO owned when he found out that he was getting reassigned and I wasn’t,” Wash said wryly. “But, yeah, okay.”

Donut had to admit, whoever the Frank was that Wash used to know, he sounded like a delight. “You do know that the doctor’s going to have to come back in to deal with that, right?” he nodded at the IV still in Wash’s arm. “Unless you want me to pull it out for you.” 

Wash wrinkled up his nose. “I’ve seen your attempts at field medicine. I think the doc would be a better option.”

“Wow, ye of such little faith,” he said, snickering as he stood and moved to the door. He knocked on it, before calling out. “Dr. Grey? David said it’s okay for you to come in and take out the IV.”

There was a clatter outside, and Wash tensed up as the door was unlocked and Grey slipped inside. 

Before she could say anything, Wash scratched the back of his head, winced, and apologized. “I’m sorry for hitting you, doc. I’m just...not a fan of hospitals.”

“Oh, already forgotten Age- David. It’s not the first time a patient has handled me poorly,” she said with a laugh, pulling on a pair of gloves. “Now, before I remove this, would you like me to tell you about the medication we were going to give you?”

He looked at Donut, who nodded. “Yeah, sure.”

“It’s a flush, basically. When you were being brought in with your head wound, you were given a sedative to help you settle and reacted poorly to it. All this is is something to flush that medication out before it causes more damage.”

Wash reached over and grabbed Donut’s arm in a bruising grip. “I...what kind of damage?”

“It’s hard to tell. We haven’t had a chance to given you a thorough examination.” Donut put his other hand on Wash’s, squeezing. 

“Hook me up. If that stuff will help then…” Wash looked sick, a look that Donut didn’t think he’d ever seen on the Freelancer’s face before. “Yeah, go ahead, doc.”

After a quick check to be sure that the IV was still in a good place, Grey hooked it up to the bag and started the drip.    


“Now, this might make you a little drowsy,” she said as she started to tidy up the area. “Frank, can you help him get situated in the bed?”

“Of course,” Donut said, before elbowing Wash in the side. "Let's get you laying down before you pass out on me."  


"That only happened once," Wash muttered, and Donut laughed. 

 

* * *

But the time Wash woke up coherent and himself again, Donut had listened to Dr. Grey passive-aggressively chew out Grif, Simmons, and Sarge, pretended to be David’s friend Frank three more times, introduced Carolina to David, and missed out on a new batch of Jensen's car engine booze.

“...what happened?”

Donut looked up from chapter 12 of Jensen’s latest fanfiction, and grinned. “Dr. Grey! Wash is awake!” he shouted, lifting his feet off the bed. “You punched Caboose and busted Tuckers arm up, mister, that’s what you did.”

“He punched me too, don’t forget that,” Grey said, walking into the room. “Now, are we back to ourselves, Agent Washington?”

“Wait, I did  _ what _ ?”

**Author's Note:**

> I've been sitting on this for...about three weeks? I'm not super pleased with it, but I also don't want to 1) rewrite it or b) write something else for this prompt rip


End file.
